Bon Appetit

My dog eats dirt. Actually, Lucy will eat just about anything, sometimes with disgusting and aromatic results. When I carted home a pickup load of horse manure for my compost pile, she thought it was a giant pile of doggie treats. In the picture, who know what she is licking off the plate. It can reasonably be assumed it was food someone left sitting around, but that I can understand. What I don't get is this. The last few months when I let her outside, she heads for the lawn (such as it is) yanks off small pieces of sod and eats them...dirt and all. At first I thought the cat had a favorite spot on the lawn and that she was, shall we say,... opening gifts. But on closer inspection, it is clear she is simply consuming what meager topsoil I have in my front yard little by little. Today I had to listen to her whine all day with what I can only assume is a painful stomach, judging from the rumblings I heard emitting from her midsection. I tried to explain to her that she might consider cutting down on the dirt, but she just looked at me with mournful brown eyes. Although dirt is at the top of her current list, if anyone is looking to get rid of tinfoil, plastic, corn cobs, litter-box scraps, heck, any kind of scraps, or needs their horse stall emptied....Lucy is your dog. Seriously, we can arrange that. I can say this for her; she does not eat the bathroom garbage can contents or underwear. My other dog, Daisy takes care of that department.

"Who, me?"